time has come to pass....
time has past through my life. but the thoughts and feelings remain fresh. the bleeding love i felt when i destroyed the one true thing we had. 3 years on. you've moved on. i've not forgiven myself. when i spoke to dayne at 2 am in the morning, on being a gentleman. i realised one thing. i'm not one.
will i ever move away from the one true love that set me free? i hope i do. i need to.
aishii says it;s a long time and she's moved on.
i say, what i did, isnt what one should do.
the complexity of the whole situation is that, i actually did love her that much. she had an abundance of energy and spare time to channel it to the relationship. i on the other hand, had the lack of time. serving the nation in an important aspect of the army, time wasnt a luxury.
the passing of time had filled the etch on my mind and soul with dust. but unfortunatly, as dusty as it is, time spent alone recreates memories.
the soul relives,
the mind rethinks,
the heart revives.
at the end of the whole 20 mins of thought, tears are a common sight. a grown man with tears isnt a pussy. it's a man in regret.
but i vow to myself, i will move, i will grow in my inabilities. and i will be a better man.
You have taught me the meaning of love, what love is about, what we should do when a problem comes heading our way. These life lessons, i've carried thru the past 3 years. and 3 years on, the etch you made... still is strong, deep in its roots.
at 4 am in the morning, i'm deep in thought. not because i miss her. because i cannot move on to grasp the present.
----
Better Man
Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow old through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man
Go easy on my conscience
'Cause it's not my fault
I know I've been taught
To take the blame
Rest assured my angels
Will catch my tears
Walk me out of here
I'm in pain
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow old through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man
Once you've found that lover
You're homeward bound
Love is all around
Love is all around
I know some have fallen
On stony ground
But Love is all around
Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow old through this pain
Lord I'm doin' all I can
To be a better man
